You might live on a farm if…
10. …you normally awake before the rooster (and when he wakes up first you have an urge to reach for the duct tape).
9. …at least once this week, you’ve been outside in PJs and rubber boots.
8. …the dockhand at the grain store starts filling your truck with your order before you get to the counter.
7. …some of your nightmares start with your kids yelling, “Mom! Dad! The goats are…”
6. …you cruise dumpsters for building supplies.
5. …your work gloves wear out too often and always in the same place.
4. …a police officer has stopped by your house to see if you’re the owner of a horse/goat/pig/cow/llama/emu/etc that’s gone walkabout.
3. …you scoff when you see “Fresh grade AA” on an egg carton in the grocery store.
2. …you shower in the evenings.
1. …at least one member of your family has seriously thought about having you committed.
(Feel free to add your own)